You're Not Bad at Journalling: Finding a Practice That Works for You

Do you keep buying beautiful journals only to abandon them after a week? Do you think you're "bad" at journalling because you don't write every day, fill pages with profound thoughts or follow a strict routine?

In this episode of MoodSwings, we unpack the biggest myth about journalling: that there's a right way to do it.

We share our own experiences of believing we were terrible journalers, only to realise that journalling can look completely different for everyone. From gratitude lists and voice notes to messy brain dumps, therapy reflections, goal setting and tracking your cycle, journalling is far more flexible than most people think.

We explore how your journalling practice can evolve throughout different seasons of life, why consistency doesn't have to mean daily and how letting go of perfection can completely change your relationship with self-reflection.

Whether you're a lifelong journal lover, someone who's tried and failed countless times or you're simply curious about using journalling to support your mental health, self-awareness, personal growth, nervous system regulation, and wellbeing, this conversation is for you.

In this episode we discuss:

• Why there's no "correct" way to journal
• Different journalling styles and techniques
• Letting go of perfectionism and all-or-nothing thinking
• Why we used to think we were bad at journalling
• How journalling changes throughout different stages of life
• Brain dumps, gratitude journals, prompts and free writing
• Journalling for anxiety, stress and emotional processing
• Building self-awareness and self-trust
• Creating a journalling practice that actually feels sustainable
• Why your journal doesn't need to be aesthetic to be valuable

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Welcome to Mood Swings with Moen Morgues. Where we chat all things womanhood, motherhood, and everything in between. We're a naturopath and a nurse who love an overshare, swapping insights and the occasional tangent.

SPEAKER_00 0:11

From hormones to healing and moments of chaos, nothing's off limits here. So let's get into it.

SPEAKER_01 0:27

Hello. Hey. How are you? I am good. I can't believe it's Friday. I can't believe it's Friday, and I think this week has been a whirlwind. Oh and it has. It's been a crazy whirlwind this week. This week has just been each day has been like significantly different. I feel like I've lived a lifetime in each day.

SPEAKER_00 0:53

A lifetime in each day. Well, what was this week?

SPEAKER_01 1:00

Exactly my point. Exactly my point. It's just like I feel like we were sitting down talking last Friday, had this Friday, and now I'm like, what the fuck?

SPEAKER_00 1:10

Yeah, well, this week has been busy. But I've only worked three days this week. I had Monday off. And whenever I have Monday off, I always feel like like Monday is my Sunday. Yeah. So when I go to work on Tuesday, I'm like, oh, it's Monday. And then everyone's like, no. It's Tuesday. I'm like, oh. And because you get Friday off as well. Yeah, so I've had a short week, but it's been it's it's been pretty busy because we've had so much going on at work and just yeah, just lots of stuff going on in the background as well. I saw my psychologist on Monday. Yeah, and um actually ties in perfectly with what we're talking about today. We're actually gonna be sort of diving into the world of journaling and picking apart what what that really is, and you know, like modern world journaling versus traditional and all of those things. But essentially she told me I need to start gratitude journaling instead of brain dumping because she pretty much said that at the moment, even though there's so many good things happening in my life, and I know that I'm really fixating on the things that I'm not like achieving or doing well, so she's like, you know, you need to reframe your your mindset, you need to rewire your thinking. And she's like, brain dumping is really good, but maybe right now it's not what you need. You need to look at the things you are grateful for, and that might help you reframe your thinking about like things that are going on.

SPEAKER_01 2:57

I couldn't, I actually couldn't agree more, and I like I guess we'll go into that a little bit further down the episode, but it was one of the things that I was going to touch on today with journaling. Like, one of the traps I find myself in is like I only write when I'm in a bad mood or I only write about the negative, and then if I go through all of my journals, I always said to Charlotte, like, can you please burn them if I ever pass away? Because someone's gonna think that I was mega depressed because it's only me writing like the not great thing.

SPEAKER_00 3:22

Yeah, but I think I think in a sense, the not great writing down the not great things when you are emo like if that's what you're feeling when you're emotional is important, and remembering that you had to get that out of your mind to be able to make space for more things. 100%, you know, but a balance like everything. Absolutely, absolutely. And we we love being grateful. We love being grateful, yeah. But before we get into the journal stuff, um, do you want to do your meat swing for today or do you want me to start? Do you have your meat swing? Oh well yeah, you start. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 4:01

Well, I actually went to a like a training naturopath night last night. Oh my god, yes. Which was so lovely. Like we went to a dinner and um there was one of these, um, one of these, like a really quite famous naturopath in the industry, and he spoke to us about inflammation. And I guess when you hear inflammation, it's like the buzzword of health at the moment. So it was when I first went into it, I was kind of like, oh, here we go.

SPEAKER_00 4:30

Like, oh my god, buzzwords, they get me.

SPEAKER_01 4:33

Yeah, I was like, okay, here we go. We're probably gonna, you know, go over stuff we've already learned before. Yeah, I was so wrong. It was so, so, so interesting. Like the way he spoke about the new technology, like how they're developing herbs so they like access parts of the body that they've never been able to access before. Like a good example is we're talking about um Alzheimer's. Yeah, and we're talking about turmeric as a treatment or a management strategy. And for so long, turmeric, like we couldn't absorb it through the blood brain barrier because the particles were too big.

SPEAKER_00 5:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 5:18

But they now have the technology to allow turmeric to enter through the blood brain barrier and actually work directly on the brain.

SPEAKER_00 5:28

Oh my god, that's amazing.

SPEAKER_01 5:29

Amazing. And then in these studies, not only were they still little nerds are like Oh, I was nerding out. I was like, oh my god, you're amazing. Um and the studies were showing that not only were they able to completely halt the progression of like any deterioration in memory or behavior, yeah, but they were actually able to improve it, which is in that space, like a lot of people would think that's impossible.

SPEAKER_00 5:57

I think there's a lot of you know, like r research and studies and new technologies that are being applied to dementia and cognitive function and you know, being able to reduce the um the probability of like Alzheimer's and all of these things. It's very, very I mean, it's always been something that's been important in healthcare and it's been studied, but I feel like media and all of those other um like social outlets are really, really shining a light on cognitive health and how to sort of incorporate these already existing things like turmeric in our in our in our health regime to sort of support us with reducing Alzheimer's and things like that. But that's amazing.

SPEAKER_01 6:56

So cool, so cool. And like the study and technology that goes into you know um making the particle of the plant different so we can access these different parts of the body. Like that's just one example. Like the examples were limitless last night.

SPEAKER_00 7:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 7:13

And I was just sitting there and I was like, oh my god, like I can't wait until this is in the world. You feel like the sponge? Were you soaking it all up? I was, and I couldn't, when I first got there, we it started at six, went to about eight, and I'm not an evening person. Like, unless I've got a bev in hand, I don't want to talk to you, to be quite honest. Like I am a morning person and a grandma, and I am a bed. By eight o'clock every single night, screens off, not like uh no.

SPEAKER_00 7:44

I'm sorry, there's no one at this summer.

SPEAKER_01 7:49

No worries. I've turned an awkward cook out in the corner. Um but yeah, no, it was so good. Like I got home and I was just like wired with all of this information. I just got home and I just had to bullet out all of the information to my sister. I was like, and she was like, okay, Morgan, calm down. Like, I actually don't care. Like this is like actually something I didn't know.

SPEAKER_00 8:12

Did she do that to you with um like teaching?

SPEAKER_01 8:16

Oh yeah, yeah. Like I know all of her kids, I know all of like I probably shouldn't say this actually, but like I know I know all like the details, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like we backtrack this. That's all I'm gonna say. Um, but yeah, no, we yeah, definitely. Oh, so good. That is my mood swing, and I feel very inspired and keen to learn more and go to more seminars and um conferences like that.

SPEAKER_00 8:44

Yeah, seminars, webinars, all of those things, conferences, they're all so good. And actually, well, that that can be my mood swing as well. So um my work wife, Holly, Holly, and I have just we're in the process of booking our um our own learning CPD stuff as a requirement for like nursing, you have to meet like 20 hours CPD, um, which is like continued professional development. We're doing this like crisis management course in anaesthetics, which is really exciting. But it's been such a weak process because we I like we have to show them our resume and like prove that we're working in that. And I'm like, why would they want our resume? Like, why don't they just want to get our employment? Like, are you already working? Literally, I think they just want to make sure that actually this conference does apply to us, but um, it's not until November. But I obviously, with being pregnant and going on maternity leave, I wanted to try and book it in as early as possible because we are lucky enough to get like reimbursed for that. So we get a percentage of like a little bit of money each year uh towards CPD and professional development leave and all of those things so we can apply that to um our leave, and then yeah, I can use that time while my maternity leave to go and learn.

SPEAKER_01 10:19

Love that.

SPEAKER_00 10:20

Yeah, so I'm excited. That was that's almost also my little highlight. We're really nerding out today.

SPEAKER_01 10:26

Love, and I just think it's so important, like in the health industries that we're in. Like, if you don't stay eager to learn, then you're going to be failing your patience. And that's what I loved about last night is I went with um, I guess you can call her my boss, and you know, she's been in the industry now for you know 20 plus years, yeah, and she's still keen to go to these things and learn. And I'm like, you have to be like that your whole career, like you can never stop. For sure. You can't stop. For sure. And it's the practitioners that do stop, you it's very evident. Like if you see them as a patient or you see them in the workplace, it's like you've kind of lost the love for the learning part of it. Like you always have to be a student.

SPEAKER_00 11:05

Well, and you always have to learn like the technologies of healthcare and even like herbalism is always constantly changing and evolving. And you can't just sit like a dinosaur and think that like what best practice was 25 years ago is gonna still apply now. Like, I reckon there's been four or five different best practices or changes in in those sort of things from 25 years ago. Yeah. It definitely is. Well, literally, I don't think like even yeah, 25 years ago, this type of anesthesia that they were giving to patients is like completely s completely opposite to what they do now, and like some some of the agents they don't even use anymore, or they really really minimise the use of like just so much stuff. But anyways, we could talk about this boring shit. All well, it's not boring to us, but it might be boring to you. Um but we could talk about it all day long. But I mean, like, today's not about that. Today is about journaling. We wanted to talk about journaling, and I've actually brought my little bookie book, um, my little TV book. It's already falling apart, so that's a whatever. This is a no. This is a big no. Um, but I was like, well, I really wanted to write some stuff down because I'm someone who in my mind I have so many thoughts and so many things I want to get out and say, but then sometimes I'm like, at the time of conversation, I like forget, and then I'm like after the fact, I'm like, oh my god, there was something like that. I wanted something to say, and I just didn't say it. But I've got it all down today, so hopefully I won't miss anything. Um, but I guess I wanted to we wanted to sort of look at journaling. I feel like journaling in the wellness space is like such a thing at the moment. It's such a buzzword.

SPEAKER_01 13:05

Buzzword. It makes me nervous when things become buzzwords because some people don't like to then do them because they feel like they're like following a trend or something.

SPEAKER_00 13:12

Yeah. Let's just let's just lay it out on the table for a second. Journaling is not a new thing. No, it's not this like trend that's gonna come and then go. It's it's been around literally since like ancient traditional times. Oh yeah. Something that is very, very, very good and has had lots of um like evidence-based research um on the benefits of it. But I guess journaling can look so different to everyone, and journaling doesn't have to have this emotional attachment to it, it doesn't have to be um always like you know, uh perfect and well formulated. Like I think in the social world, it looks like you know, you have to have everything written out so perfectly, and like you're still putting on a performance, but journaling isn't about performing, journaling is about being present for yourself, it's about a moment of being able to like mentally declutter, emotionally release, bring out your creative juices. Like it's there's so many beautiful benefits for journaling. Do you reckon?

SPEAKER_01 14:32

Yeah, oh my god, I love journaling. So yeah, that was well said.

SPEAKER_00 14:35

So I have I have a question for you, Miss Morgan. Miss Morgan.

SPEAKER_01 14:40

Miss Morgan.

SPEAKER_00 14:42

What are we in a class? Um, what does journaling look like for you right now?

SPEAKER_01 14:50

For right now, I feel like I'm in a bit of a good space of journaling because I've been doing it for such a long time. So my relationship with it is, like you said, messy. And I have probably like maybe five random books in different locations of my house, one in my bag. Um, that when I have thoughts, I randomly just scatter them down. I always put a date, but like literally there'll be like a May date in one book, then a May date in another book, and then it's so scattered. But for me, it's like I journal when inspiration strikes with like my business, yeah. Or when I feel like I need to, like you said, brain dump, and there's like information that I need to get out of my subconscious, but I feel like it's not necessarily a conversation I want to have with another person. Like I feel like it's a conversation I want to have with myself. Um I also personally do a lot of journaling, which sounds a bit woo-woo, but when I pull tarot cards, like there's never a time when I don't pull my tarot cards that I won't then write it down.

SPEAKER_00 15:59

I love the woo-woo in us.

SPEAKER_01 16:01

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_00 16:02

I think everyone has a little bit of woo-woo in them. I don't agree. Yes, no, they just haven't opened them.

SPEAKER_02 16:11

You have emotion stuff, not everyone has woo-woo in them. I fucking promise you that.

SPEAKER_00 16:17

She hasn't done like um cleansing of her chakras.

SPEAKER_02 16:20

No.

SPEAKER_01 16:24

Um, but which we'll get into a bit later. Like, I like that you said before that it shouldn't be performative and it doesn't need to be perfect. Because I remember when I first started, that is the part that kind of made me nervous to start because I used to be such a type A, like very organized person. And I was like, oh my god, like what if I can't keep all the journals organized? What if I can't look back through the Oh my god, no. But then one of my old friends, she was an amazing writer and she would just like literally do what I do now. Like I kind of copied her method. She just had books randomly scattered everywhere. Yeah. The way she would articulate words, like she'd let me read her journals sometimes. That's really, really special. She was amazing, amazing, amazing. Like such a good writer, still is such a good writer and I was. Um, and yeah, I think watching her and how she did it inspired me. And now, yeah, I've been journaling now for like you know, 10 years, so it's been yeah, good.

SPEAKER_00 17:30

Well, it's good that you have been journaling for so long, and I think there is a really big stigma around journaling, I guess. Do you think? Yes, or do you think so? I think that there is this comparison to what journaling is and what journaling looks like for each individual, and then what journaling looks like on social media.

SPEAKER_01 17:57

And like I understand actually, because even on movies, I remember when I was watching this is gonna sound so rude, but vampire diaries. Vampire Diaries is a perfect example. Yeah, and you and how Stefan would write down all of the years, and I remember watching that in like grade 12, um, but I wasn't journaling in grade 12, and that was when he put this idea in my head that it had to be perfect because he had like didn't he have like all of his years?

SPEAKER_00 18:25

Yeah, well, and also but vampire diaries was like very narrated, it was like a narrated yeah, it was a narrated journal, so you it it felt like well, yeah, it was a bit of a story.

SPEAKER_01 18:36

And I thought that like when you journaled you have to write like oh so today at work I saw the love of my life.

SPEAKER_00 18:43

Write two pages down. Yeah, no, yeah, okay, that's what you mean, like the idea of So for me I've written down here the pressure social media creates around perfect healing routines, and I think that's just because obviously with like Love Lani and with um I think my feed is just very much like health and wellness, blah blah blah. But a lot of these things come up on my socials being like, you know, writing down like big long paragraphs of how they're feeling and blah blah blah, and like I just think it doesn't have to work like that. I'm not someone who like I journal, but I'm not like someone who journals like a whole note and then you know sits there and rar-dy-da reflects.

SPEAKER_01 19:36

I think but it can look like that, yes, yes, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 19:40

There's a different method for everyone, 100% there's a different method, but and I think as well, like I I think there's like this fear of reading your emotions, uh-huh. But journaling doesn't just have to be an emotional release, it can be a creative release as well. Like if you have these like ideas or manifestations that you want to bring to life, you can do like manifestation journaling or you know, like creative journaling, like putting stickers on a book and stuff. Like there's so many different things. Like scrapbooking, yeah, so many different ways to do it. Um, but I think there definitely is like I don't know, I'd I I'd be interested to know how many people actually really journal in the world.

SPEAKER_01 20:27

Yeah, interesting. I've always been surrounded by so many people that do, so I just assumed that it was a normal thing. A normal thing, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 20:34

Well, it'd be interesting to see the stats. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 20:38

Definitely.

SPEAKER_00 20:39

Um, but why journaling helps with our mental clutter? Clut clutter. Clarity.

SPEAKER_02 20:46

Mental clarity. Mental clutter and mental clutter clarity.

SPEAKER_00 20:51

Um, it's an emotional release. Uh-huh. I think for me it's really helped with like a self-awareness. I think when you're someone who's like an anxiety-driven person like myself, I don't realize how much my anxiety is like affecting me until I have the ability to like write things out or put it on my notes or brain dump, and then I'm like, okay, I I brain dump and I get to see like all of the things that I've written, and then I'm like, oh shit, why am I actually like I didn't realize, but I'm actually feeling this way. And I think it sort of helps you take away a bit of that like space in your brain. But you also don't allow yourself to create more space to breathe in your mind. So for me, like being able To put it on paper or even like put it on my notes or whatever, it helps me to just like take that away from my my my brain and help like create a bit more self-awareness. So that's a big one for me. I think it's also like nervous system regulation.

SPEAKER_01 22:19

100%, 100%. And if you're someone like like both of us that likes to talk a lot, and I feel like I'm speaking on behalf of both of us right now. So if I'm saying if I'm saying the incorrect, if I'm being incorrect, interrupt me. But I think you're right, like being able to brain dump is not only important for our nervous system regulation, it's also important for the people around us because I think we could probably be guilty of say coming home from like a hard day or we're feeling really anxious and then putting it on our loved ones. Yeah. Which don't get me wrong, you need your support support system, but sometimes they're also going through it. Yeah. If you can journal and rely on yourself that little bit more and not expect them to then be the journal.

SPEAKER_00 23:09

Oh my god, you just said it so perfectly because I actually did this to Cameron the other day. I did all the time. And I caught myself doing it, and I was like, what are you actually doing? Yeah. Why are you? This isn't fair. Yeah, I'm like, why is he in the firing line? Just because I had a busy day, lots was going on, and then I came home, and I think like obviously they say, you know, the people that are closest to you are the ones that get everything, the brunt of everything most, which is I know like a horrible thing to think. But it is true, like because you know that they're your safe space, and in a sense you you almost do want to do that release, but then you realise, well, no, it's not fair on them because you can't you can't allow what's impacting you to impact them because then how do you help each other in that situation? It does it, it ends up making you like butt heads. And so I found myself doing that literally on Wednesday night, and then he he sort of brought me back to Earth because I had a moment of like I snapped, and he was like, Whoa, yeah, like what does this have to do with me? We just need to chill out for a second, and I'm like, Wow, you're right.

SPEAKER_02 24:21

I don't know. But also when people don't need to chill out and you're just you're like, oh fucking shut up.

SPEAKER_00 24:26

I know. And then afterwards I was like, Oh shit.

SPEAKER_02 24:30

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:32

And I I think that was probably a day I needed to really release.

SPEAKER_01 24:37

Yeah. And like just coming back to the importance of journaling, like if you did it's hard though when you're in that energetic, heightened state to then go and do something that's quite still. Yeah. I think that is the difficulty as well. And like maybe that's when things like going for a walk or exercise or that kind of stuff, and then coming to journal after is probably helpful.

SPEAKER_00 24:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 24:57

Um but yeah, I think for both of us, because we are just like that chatty, chatty, chatty person. And if you're the same, like if you're a more of a like an outward person, you don't internalize things, you externalise them. I think that's when journaling. You think it'd be the opposite, but I think journaling's even kind of more important then because you need that that backboard to like put your thoughts somewhere. And if it's not a person.

SPEAKER_00 25:25

Well, like I I think of it like this. I get to put my thoughts somewhere in there, like stuck there.

SPEAKER_01 25:30

Yeah. You've spoken to something, it doesn't have to be a person.

SPEAKER_00 25:34

It's been stuck, they're not gonna come circle back around. Yeah. Or if they do, it's not as like intense for me.

SPEAKER_01 25:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 25:44

I think.

SPEAKER_01 25:44

No, I agree.

SPEAKER_00 25:46

Um, but in the beginning when I did journaling, I did really feel like it was a chore, and I think I did a few things wrong. Oh, interesting. I think for me, I really was like, no, you have to journal, you have to do this. This is gonna be good for your mental clarity, this is gonna be good for emotional releasing, blah blah blah blah blah. So I was like really like, I'm gonna put I'm gonna do like five, ten minutes of like just getting it out, even if I didn't feel like journaling. And I think that's where I went wrong. I think when I do journaling best is when I'm in an emotional state where I need that to be released, not just like you know, it was like a I had to do it every day, regardless of if I felt like I needed to journal or not. And so because of that, I would do it and then I would like stop and I just wouldn't go back to it because I felt like it felt like a chore.

SPEAKER_01 26:50

It was like almost going to the gym and doing the exercise you hate every single day instead of like mixing it up a little bit.

SPEAKER_00 26:57

Yeah. Yeah. Like if you're a gym person and you are you know that your your strong suit is like strength training, but you go and do cardio.

SPEAKER_01 27:08

Yeah, you're running on the treadmill every day instead of breaking it up.

SPEAKER_00 27:10

Yeah, like you're you're you're gonna you're more likely gonna flop on that because well one, you you hate cardio.

SPEAKER_01 27:19

And two who actually likes a treadmill?

unknown 27:22

I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 27:24

And two, if strength training is really what your your strong suit is, well, why don't you do that? You know, why don't you focus on that? And I think that's what I was doing. I was focusing on just like trying to always be like the perfect journaler. Yeah. And in the process of that, I actually I actually like regressed as a perfect journaler way more. But when I just listened to the emotions and feelings I was feeling and like when I knew I needed to release those at that point, that was when I would journal best.

SPEAKER_01 28:00

Yeah, and it's interesting, like I think we've both like from discussions now of like our journey, both of us have gone through that initial period where it was supposed to be like a perfect thing we did, and it was as soon as we like let go of the perfection, or like you said at the start, the um what'd you say, like the performance kind of yeah, the affirmative like as soon as that's released and you find the way that works best for you, that's when it starts to become like a really useful tool that will be something that is useful for now your whole life, as opposed to doing it perfectly for a week, yeah, and then not touching it for six months.

SPEAKER_00 28:35

Exactly. And journaling looks very different for me than it probably does for other people. 100%. For me, I've got notes like countless notes in my phone of like different feelings and emotions at the time that I was feeling them. If I didn't have my journal with me, I would just do it on my notes. Yeah. And then if I'm at home and I've got time and I'm in that headspace to want to journal, then I'll go and do it. But I think there I think some ideas to make um journaling feel less like a chore is to maybe start with two minutes rather than like being like, oh, I'm gonna carve out 15 minutes of my time. Like start with two minutes, see how you're feeling. If you if the flow starts flowing and you you're in that groove, then keep it going. Like and also don't force consistency because I think that was the problem when I first started journaling, is like I was forcing the consistency, and then because of that, I actually wasn't being consistent. Um and there's nothing wrong with being inconsistent with journaling. No, like it's not meant to be like this you're not writing yourself a big memoir.

SPEAKER_01 29:52

Or not Matthew McConaughey. But you can, but you can, you can but you can, yes. Like, if that's the style that like I think that's the point we're trying to get across with journaling, is it looks different for everyone, like 100%. Some people, like my auntie, she journals every single day, and in her will is the thing that I get are all her journals, and for the last 40 years, she has created a memoir.

SPEAKER_00 30:17

Oh my god, that's amazing!

SPEAKER_01 30:18

Every single day.

SPEAKER_00 30:20

Well, people do, like people journal for decades, yeah. And then you know, like even it's just he's easy to sort of put in the spotlight because he's famous and people know him, but Matthew McConaughey literally is journaled from like the age of 18, and so in his memoir, Green Lights, it's a great book by the way, if you want to read it, it's such a good read. Um, I don't read very often, but that was a good one. I actually liked it. That I liked. It's so inspiring. So inspiring. But he he had all of this, like over the last decade of his life, he had all of these um journals that he had like picked apart and put in in green lights, and it was just like amazing. And you can do that, you definitely can do that. And some people end up naturally just doing that. But I think when you're getting into the groove of it, you just shouldn't put so much pressure on yourself, I think.

SPEAKER_01 31:19

No, no, and it's always like working. If that's like a goal of yours, is like you can always work up until that point. Um but yeah, starting small is always the best way to go for sure.

SPEAKER_00 31:35

And I think um, like you don't have to sound profound. I think this is what I was trying to say earlier. You don't have to sound profound. It's like not this isn't a place for you to perform, it's like a a place for you to express yourself, and this isn't meant to be like it's a it's a private space for you and your thoughts. It's not meant to be like curated for the world to see. Unless you want the world to see it, but I mean that's actually something I struggled with at the start as well.

SPEAKER_01 32:03

Like I was writing as if I remember I would always be writing as if someone was going to read it, and I was like, why am I doing this? Like there's no no one is reading, no one has ever read any of my journals, nor will they. Like, I'd actually cry my eyes out.

SPEAKER_02 32:16

Yeah. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 32:18

Like the amount of times I've gone through my house and like collected them all to make sure I know they're all in one place, and like, oh um, but I actually used to do that at the start, like I was writing as if someone was going to read it, and I was like, please stop doing that. Like that is helping no one, and you're not you're not getting to the deeper layer that you need to be getting when you are still thinking there's an audience watching what you're doing. There isn't. This is literally a conversation between you and you.

SPEAKER_00 32:44

Exactly. So I like that. Um other things that I think help make it feel less like a chore is like pairing it with other existing routines. So, like maybe if you are someone who is very like routine, um focused, and in the morning you always have like your breakfast and you sit down at your table. Like you could use that time then, but instead of scrolling on TikTok. Yeah, like just while you're having your coffee, writing down, and then like there you go, that's done for the day. Boom.

SPEAKER_01 33:20

And like what your psychologist was saying, that's like probably a good time to be a bit more grateful in the morning. And have you heard of the oh god, I forget his name now, the imperfects, the um we got a husband's podcast. Yeah, yeah. So he always says, like, from memory, write three things you're grateful for.

SPEAKER_00 33:37

Yeah, there is the three, two, one, yeah, which I think it is.

SPEAKER_01 33:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 33:41

And you do like three things you're grateful for. Some oh, I don't I don't know it too well, but um I know that there is like a like a prompt or like method that helps you, like two things that you could improve on on like like one thing you reflect on in your day.

SPEAKER_01 33:59

Yeah, I don't know. Which is beautiful, and that morning period, that's when they say like your subconscious is like the most permeable to import. So like if that's when you sit down and watch breakfast and you watch TikTok, that's going to influence in your whole day. Whereas if you journal and you are you know writing down the three. You're all guilty of that. Oh my god, I did it this morning. It's still off campus in the highlights, which that's making me grateful for life anyway. But like if you are habit stack and you're doing it in the morning, that's probably the great a great chance to do the things you're more grateful for. For sure.

SPEAKER_00 34:35

And like there's so many different types of journaling too. So I think we've touched on a few. Uh gratitude journaling, which is like talking about things that you're grateful for, focusing on um things in your day that you're grateful for, uh, and then there's like brain dump, which is the one I do the most, but I'm changing it up and doing gratitude. And brain dumping is Thanks Psychologists. Yeah, thanks psychologists. Which I like I said, I think is such an important and you don't have to do like the same journaling all the time. Like you change it to what you're going through or how you're feeling at the time. Like if you notice that you need to like I when we were when I was talking with my psychologist and she was like, No, you actually need to maybe change the type of journaling you're doing. Because when I'm when you're brain dumping, it's just you're literally anything that's in here you just put to paper or put to your notes, whatever. And it's there's no rhyme or reason, it's just like, hey, feeling what's going on in your mind, like blah blah blah. It's literally just like brain dump. Um and sometimes you're really surprised by the things that can come up because you like the negativity that you don't realise you're holding in your in your brain.

SPEAKER_01 35:51

Yeah, yeah. Even though you feel like it's not negative, yeah, and it kind of can sometimes yeah, it just keeps flowing out. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 35:59

Like, holy shit.

SPEAKER_00 36:00

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 36:02

Okay, that's what I said. If anyone, if I die, my instruction to Charlotte is burn my journals. Burn it, baby. Voice note journaling. You do this? I do that when I'm driving because I drive a lot. But again, they usually, like I will admit, they usually um actually this is when I use them. If I want to have a conversation with someone, then I know that I'm never gonna be able to have the conversation. Like if I have frustration towards them. Yeah, I've done it a lot during breakups. Like, I want to say things to this person, but I know I can't, so I'll voice note.

SPEAKER_02 36:35

And I tell you, listening back years later is fucking hilarious.

SPEAKER_00 36:39

I know, I know. Okay, well, let's quickly just I wanna um keep touching on that. So, with the voice note journaling, how does it make you feel after when you have been able to like release what you want to say to that person but you haven't been able to say to them?

SPEAKER_01 36:55

Oh my god, so good. And I'd be crying. It is especially, I will say for me, it's been so useful during breakups because again, like we were saying before, being very external people, especially when say a breakup hasn't been necessarily on my terms or they've broken up with me, I still have so much left to say that I haven't been able to. Because it's just been like Do you think it gives you closure a little bit? I don't know, I don't know if closure would be the right word. I think it allows me to just move, like you said, move through the emotions. Like it allows me to have a big cry, it allows me to talk to me.

SPEAKER_00 37:30

Create more space in your brain for other things.

SPEAKER_01 37:33

Exactly. Exactly. Closure pie. Yeah, I don't know about closure, but I do know that it's a good release. It's a fucking fantastic release. I'll be driving home on the highway. I'm thinking back on a memory now for two years ago now, so it's a bit hazy, but like hauling my eyes out. And then the memory actually wasn't re-triggered until we started filming these podcasts.

SPEAKER_02 37:56

Because the memos were on the computer.

SPEAKER_01 38:06

Um, but yeah, very useful. Especially if you do a lot of driving, because like obviously, if you're stuck in traffic, all you need to do is click the record button and you're literally just talking.

SPEAKER_00 38:16

Just talk, like as if you're talking on the phone. Yeah. I talk in the card to myself. Yeah, so you might as well record it. Yeah. You might as well. You shouldn't. I shouldn't. Um, there's also like creative journaling. Yeah. So like scrapbooking or um like having like positive affirmation stickers or whatever you feel is memories, like tickets, yeah, wristbands. Like sort of like um what are they called? Um, do they have a name? Or am I just like fully like a scrapbook? Yeah, maybe it is. I don't know. Um there's one line a day, which I actually love doing. I love doing a one line a day because for me, especially in my current state of life, I don't have necessarily the luxury to sit down for a minute by myself. But if I just write a line a day, I'm still able to get something out, and then boom, I can just continue on. Continue on your day. And then you can look at that one line a day and like be like, oh wow. Over the days that you've done them, you can see the difference of what you were feeling in that day versus maybe like a week ago.

SPEAKER_01 39:36

And it's a good, it's nice to be able to track the fluctuation in um moods too, to know that things are just flowing. Like you're not gonna feel you feel good one day, you feel shit the next, you feel good the next day, you feel shit the next. Like it it's all temporary, it's all good. And the journal kind of shows the fluctuations.

SPEAKER_00 39:55

Another one is reflection, which I actually love doing. I love doing reflection journaling, and that's just like reflecting on like big events in your life. Like I reflected on having Lani, and you reflect on or prompt journaling, which sort of helps you do a bit of reflection in that as well. Yeah, which is good. Like my I've got it here. Yeah, the words of introspection guided journal is really good if you do want to get stuff out, but you're not really sure what you want to get out, or you need some help and guidance into into what you sort of wanna like peel back. Um, but uh, I want to know what would you say to someone who thinks that they can't do or are bad at journaling? Wait, can you ask that again? Okay, I thought we'll walk in on the spot. Um, what would you say to someone who thinks they can't do or are bad at journaling?

SPEAKER_01 41:00

Uh-huh. I have this. Quote unquote. I have had this experience before. I have a practical tip. Practical tip. A practical tip. Sorry. If you think you're bad at journaling, usually, again, like we've been touching on, I think it comes from like that perfectionism, or you feel like you're not doing it right. And the way that I started when I was like really young, like getting into it, was I had a like a planner, like just a planner you get from like a news agent, yeah. That had like the weeks in the one page, so it had like you know, the Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and had like a tiny little area, uh-huh. And I would just fill in that area every day. So then you could see that the pages were getting like filled up so quickly, and you were only writing like three sentences every day. Yeah. But you could see it spread across the page, and then you kind of slowly start to see how your style of writing or how your style of journaling um, you know, comes to fruition. Because you'll probably start by saying, Oh, today I went out with my friends and I had a birthday, and then eventually it's gonna evolve into oh, I'm feeling this way, or this evokes this emotion in me, and you know, you'll find your flow more easily. Whereas I think if you're opening up a blank journal, even one with a even one with a prompt, um, it can be a little bit intimidating.

SPEAKER_00 42:32

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 42:35

So, yeah. What would be your tip for someone that thinks that they might be I hate saying the word bad, but I have heard people say I'm a bad journal, so like I'm not gonna do it.

SPEAKER_00 42:46

Um, well, I would say, well, I was a bad journaler too. I mean, I guess there's no right or wrong in journaling. You um don't have to start off big, but if you at least start somewhere, even if you intend on like buying yourself a journal or you do it on your notes, whatever works for you, um, I think is like the step in the right direction, and like it's I think just reminding yourself that it's not about performance, I think that's the biggest thing because at the beginning I've I was running as well, like as if someone was going to main character. Well, oh my god. Running as if I was in some movie, you know. Like I'm not I'm not Bridget Jones.

SPEAKER_02 43:35

Yeah, remember you'd be driving as a kid and it'd be raining and there'd be like emotional music on like B105 and you'd be looking at the window like there was someone looking.

SPEAKER_00 43:45

Um, but yeah, like taking it easy, only like easing yourself into it if it's a foreign space to you, like journaling isn't something you are used to doing. Um, don't overwhelm yourself too fast with it because you'll probably end. Up putting yourself off, yeah. So I think you know, have clear reasons as to why you want to do it. Like, is it because you need to help like mentally declutter, or is it because you want to help um reduce like stress and anxiety, or like what is the main driver behind your journaling? Is it because you want to manifest or be creative? And then from there, I think then that that's where you can sort of focus the energy and the way that the the road flows for it.

SPEAKER_01 44:36

I love it. Love it. I could have another tip that's come to me. Okay, tip on. Well, it's a bit more of a story. Okay, story on. Sorry, story on. I will. Um yeah, more talking on like journaling, like removing the barrier and creating like not making it a scary thing to do. Another good way to use a journal is like when you do things by yourself, it can become like your best friend. So, like, say if you are going to a cafe by yourself, or if you are traveling by yourself and like obviously you still want to go out to dinner and you still want to have a glass of wine. It's a really good way to feel like you're still talking with someone. So you're still able to go out, do these things by yourself. Yeah. But you're not sitting there kind of weird awkwardly, you're not scrolling on your phone because like why would you want to go to a cafe by yourself and then sit there and scroll on Instagram? Like, no. So instead, you go and get your coffee.

SPEAKER_00 45:35

Soak in the environment.

SPEAKER_01 45:36

Yeah, and not feel awkward and weird in your surroundings being by yourself, but you're also still having that conversation, you're just having a conversation with your journal, and then all of a sudden the relationship you get with the journal is like you're going out for coffee with your best friend, like you're going out for coffee with your journal.

SPEAKER_00 45:52

Literally, your journal could be called Journey. Exactly.

unknown 46:00

Yup.

SPEAKER_00 46:02

And on that note, what are you doing today? I'm just having a coffee with Journey. What about you? And on that note. Okay, I'm losing the poor. Okay. Should we wrap that up then?

SPEAKER_01 46:15

We're gonna wrap it up as Lani's gonna scream at us, but Lani is gonna scream. Thank you, Mo, for sharing so much today. I feel like you were so organized. Oh my god, I was excited!

SPEAKER_00 46:29

Well, this was sort of my journaling for the podcast, because I was just like, oh my god, I wanna there's so many things I wanna say, and sometimes I'm just a such a bing bonger that I just like start off in one spot and then I'm like blah blah blah bing and just say something else, and I'm just we both do that. So I think this sort of helped me go, okay.

SPEAKER_01 46:52

Let's bring it back in. We actually kind of stuck to a structure this week, which is which is nice, it'll be nice. Um obviously we're getting better at this. Yeah, we hope. Um, but yeah, hopefully this episode has helped you guys. And if you haven't started your journaling um journey yet, or if you have and you want to change it a little bit, or if you want to buy a journal from Blavlani because they have some really great, great prompts and those bad boys. Yeah. The world is your oyster in regards to journaling. Open that oyster up. Open that oyster, get that pearl. Get that pearl. Get that pearl. Bye guys.